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Then you showed up.”“Where were you when all this was happening?” asked the officer turning to Jerry.“I was driving over here. I’m not living in the house at the moment. My ex-wife trashed the house when she moved out and I’ve been having a lot of work done on it to get it back into a condition where we can move in,” answered Jerry. He looked at the open front door wondering how much damage his ex-wife had done.“Have you been inside, yet?”“No. I was waiting for you to arrive,” answered Jerry.The officer went to the front door and looked in the house. He stood there for a minute and then called over to Jerry, “You need to come over here.”Terrified at what he was going to find, Jerry stood up and walked over to the door. Even before reaching the door, he could see some of the damage through the front window.Angry, he shouted, “Fuck!”From the front door, he could see that his ex-wife had done a number on the inside of the house. With a can of red spray paint, she had written ‘Gorilla’. The fetish-minded showgirl went under the stage-name of Carmelita and was billed as a Brazilian bombshell to scoop up the homebodies that were hoping to find something a little unusual and strange to file in their memory banks. Of course, her name wasn’t Carmelita and she had never been out of the country in her entire lifetime. Her real name was Janice and she was born and raised in a suburb of Chicago as the middle child of a church-going couple that secretly used spanking and submissive behavior to spice up their lackluster lives behind closed doors.I suspected that the innocent-looking Janice had been exposed to that lifestyle at an early age and she never looked back on a lifetime of proper behavior. Now, she was desperately returning to normalcy in an attempt to right her listing boat before she capsized and went all the way down to Davey Jones locker in shameful disgrace.I empathized with her need for normalcy and down deep in my soul I knew she was probably making the right.
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